Alexa Stevenson's issue: "I can't throw away mementos. I still have every note passed to me in junior high."
"Birthday cards, old journals, piles of photos from college, and more, all stuffed into bins. Sorting through them feels like an overwhelming prospect. I have saved these things for so long, it would feel like throwing out old friends."
Alexa is having trouble discriminating between important and less important memories in her life, which is why she has so much stuff. Pack rats tend to not trust their own memories; they worry that without the keepsakes they won't be able to remember the past.
No single strategy for eliminating this clutter works for everyone, so brainstorming ways to help yourself let go of your junk is the best way to start. Ask yourself what you would grab if you only had an hour to save things. Ask yourself if you would buy it again if you were shopping for it right now. Would you advise your children to save the same things you are saving? For mementos, sometimes it helps to make a rule of "firsts," like only letters from the first boyfriend get saved, the rest get tossed.
Sometimes it helps to purge slowly. Get rid of one thing, then see how you feel about it a few days later, a week later, two weeks later. Most people find they are not nearly as upset as they expected to be. It gets easier and easier.
You have to be honest about the past. People hold on to stuff because they feel like the old days were better, but it is probably not true. Embrace your present life. Holding onto the past limits space for memories you're making right now. Paring down on the clutter of the past can actually let you focus on the mementos that make your memories more vivid.
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